Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
