Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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