I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
