Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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