i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
