How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
no, he came in my armpit
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
