Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
