Joe is yelling at the trees again.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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