My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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