dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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