when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
