im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
she pinky promised me she was 18
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
