Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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