We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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