You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Randomize
