I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Panties = found
Randomize
