sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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