once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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