I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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