but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
