i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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