After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
