so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
