she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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