dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
