Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
