a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize