Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize