Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
