it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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