Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
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