I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
