i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
ttyl tear gas
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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