she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
