cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
are you so shy because you have an std?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
