I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
