Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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