I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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