my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
