I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Alive.
So much puke
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
