So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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