My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
