Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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