Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Green mimosas i think yes
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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