he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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