We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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