is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
