You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
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There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You had me at "let me see your balls"