I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
