I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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